So don't piss me off. Play nice, don't give me shit unless you're one of my peeps. And don't give my peeps shit. That's my job.

If you act like a dick, I will ban your ass faster than you can say "Cornhole me with a Garden Weasel."

If you didn't just get a vivid and unpleasant mental image, you're probably not old enough to read this journal, so get off my lawn.

Yo, standuponit, you suuuuck. I gotta learn to dance like that, man. Girls dig it.

In case I didn't say it loud enough last night, happy birthday, dude. Glad you're here.

Needs to work on his core.